11/16/05

The Forest for the Trees - A Dysfunctional Parable - Part Two

The Forest for the Trees - A Dysfunctional Parable - Part Two
By Iam Confused, PFPS*, AMMMIT**, and RMS***
Later the same day at my front row seat at the Olympic pool, I watched the swimmers walk out on the deck for the 100 meter swim final. They took off their sweats and much to my dismay, they all had upper crossed syndrome. Once again I tried to get someone’s attention. There was no way they could perform with such a limiting condition. Once again I was ignored. The results were the greatest swim final ever. All broke the previous Olympic record and one second separated the field. How could they do that with such a severe impairment as the upper crossed syndrome?
After a very restless night, filled with worry about those poor athletes who were obviously at great risk I arrived early at the start of the marathon to see the runners warming up. A few were trying to touch their toes to no avail. Once again I was amazed how they could possibly run 26 miles, they all have pronation distortion syndrome. This time instead of trying to stop the race I resigned myself to the fact that they could not possibly finish. I did not get to see the finish because I tripped on a step and sprained my ankle while drawing in to activate my transverse abdominis in order to activate the correct firing sequence so I would not collapse while stepping down.
What is the moral of this story? Don’t get drawn in. THINK!!!
The human body is terrifically adaptive machine designed to move and function in a variety of postures. The body solves movement problems, not by consciously trying to fire muscles, but by relying on input from the body, gravity, and the ground. Get them moving, keep them moving. Use common sense.

1 Comments:

At 11/17/05, 8:38 AM, Blogger Joe Przytula said...

Now you've done it Vern. You have resolved yourself to functional hell for your challenging conventional dogma. Doing single leg squats on a physioball while juggling botox vials for eternity. Your only hope for salvation is to take someone else's research, steal it, misinterpret it, copyright it, and reinvent yourself as the new movement messiah.

 

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